Dads

FOR ERIC OHMY

It is hard to believe it has been a year since my Dad died. I have processed so much as one is apt to do when you lose someone so dear. I went through intense sadness and grief, then some anger, then more sadness, then some joy as I thought of the wonderful things my dad passed to me that makes me individual, creative and full of life. Dads have SO much power and influence on us. When my dad was alive, I always tried to make him proud of me. I continue to do so, maybe even more now. There is something about knowing your dad approves of you that drives each of us so much.

I am reprising this blog entry for two reasons; one is to somehow commemorate the anniversary of my dad's passing and the other is because a young man who has been in my life for a long time is in the same place. Eric is one of my son's CORE friends and he lost his dad this week.

Eric is an awesome young man. He is a collegiate football player, has an incredible sense of humor (which I pray helps him get through this) and an infectious laugh. He is one of those people who simply is a joy to be around and he is one of my LOST buddies (meaning we spent hours watching episode after episode after episode together in my living room with my sons). Eric's dad was and is very proud of him, because Eric is PURE GOLD. Eric's dad did a good job of adding to the world with Eric and his brother, two very fine humans. Eric is only twenty-two and it seems very unfair that he will have to travel life's ups and downs without his dad. I know the burn of this, because I lost my mom when I wasn't that much older than him.

Sometimes God gives us good substitutes here on earth until we are reunited with those we love. I am more than willing to be a substitute for this fine young man. I would be proud to have Eric call me dad, so I will do what I can to fulfill a "dad" role for him in any way he needs me to.

We are in a club that neither of us would choose to be in. We are not orphans though, because we have another Father. The one that looks down with love on us and loves us no matter what we do.

If you are the praying kind, please pray for my buddy Eric and if you think about it, throw a few prayers skyward for the University of Wyoming Cowboys, that's football for those of you who didn't know, and especially for #36, who's father will now have the best seat in the house!

Here's to our dads Eric!

Dad, inevitably telling mom a story.

I lost my dad yesterday and my heart is heavy. My heart is also so full, because he was a good dad and a good man and in many ways believed in me and championed my life. My dad was an English professor for forty years and read many of my drafts and sent them to me with thoughtful, encouraging and great notes over the years (he also had a wicked, good red pen that he used liberally and gracefully to instruct).

I talked to my dad for hours every Saturday. He was literally one of the most interesting people I have ever known. It seemed he knew something about everything I mentioned. Well traveled, well taught, opinionated but willing to hear the other side too. I will miss our talks more than I even realize now.

My dad tried in vain for years to get published and wrote some four novels that have never been read. BUT, my dad was SO happy and proud of my success in the literary world, he felt as though he shared in my success and he did. Perhaps somehow my dad's work will get another look.

So what I do when I feel deeply is write, get it out, get it down and deal with it. My first published book, My Garden Visits, was a book I wrote after losing my mom. At first I wrote it for just me, to purge, to get my sorrow and memories down on paper and out of my body, my head, my heart. Soon the words turned into a book and traveled into many homes to help others to deal with the same. It liberated me to do what mom would have wished for my life. To use my passion and to live everyday as thought it might be my last. To leave a lasting impression, which I have tried and am trying to do daily.
Mom never got to see me as an author. She too was a professor of English and German and would love nothing more than to know her son went on in life to spread more entertainment, amusement and books into the world. I know she knows.

Last spring I was asked to submit the following for an anthology by authors. I haven't heard back from the publisher, so I can now assume they didn't choose mine. But, it seemed appropriate to post it, so someone could read it.

Mom, listening with rapt attention, or thinking, wow, when will this one end? Looks like she is asleep with her eyes open, lol. Dad could go on a bit... hmmm... is that where I get that?

Bit of enduring wisdom received as a child –
My Father had a mantra that he seemed to only repeat to me, never my brother who was a boy, and is a man of few words. My father would say to me, “There is a virtue in learning when to keep your mouth shut.” It took me a long time to understand what he was saying. I now know that when my mouth is shut others are open and with the ratio of two ears to one mouth I learn twice as much as I teach.

Most people like to be listened to and some tell the same story over and over, assuming everyone is interested. People simply want to heard and often tensions, stress and in the most escalated case wars are caused by parties feeling they aren’t being listened to or heard. Dad also said to leave the world much better than you found it. He did. He left me and I will go on trying to leave the world better.

“A laughing minute is one well spent, for time has up and gone and went...”

Wisdom to a child

Time is fleeting,
Time is short,
Laugh every day until you snort...
A minute gone,
And then another...
And soon your older;
A dad or mother.
You only get so many days,
So spend each of them well.
So you'll have stories
to someday, sometime tell.




Thank you Dad!
Thank you Mom!
Goodbye...

CATCH THE READING BUG!

THIS IS A READING BUG! I'LL EXPLAIN...

So, I was having a meeting at The Tattered Cover and as I prepared my stuff, in my overstuffed vehicle, one of my new books hurtled to the ground. I had to put a bunch of stuff together so I just left it sitting there on the ground (actually three moms and four reading age kiddoes were heading down the sidewalk right toward the book and I thought, "Hmmm subtle marketing technique! They will see it, pick it up and realize I dropped it!", since it looks just like the case full that was sitting still opened up in my car trunk and maybe ask why I had so many of the same book."

I continued to ready myself for the meeting, pulling things together when one of the kids yelled, "WOW, HOW COOL!!"



I started to smile and my eyebrows wiggled up and down as if to say, "OH YEAH, THE NEW BOOK'S A HIT!" I closed my car door and said, "Pretty cool cover huh?" The four kids looked at me like I had two heads. "LOOK MOM!" The sole girl pointed down at a Praying Mantis slowly walking across the sidewalk. Soon it was walking right over my book, seemingly pausing to admire the artwork by the stellar David Schiedt!

I wanted to say, "Well, the bug IS cool, but check out the book!" But I didn't. No, instead I whipped out my iPhone in modern fashion and started to snap pics of the beautiful bug and the beautiful book. The green beauty held my attention long after the kids walked off far enough now behind their moms not to worry that I overheard, "Jeez, you'd think that dude'd never seen a bug before."


Well, at least my initial reader paused long enough to see the cover. After the Mantis' long journey, it, he, she, headed toward the parking lot. I picked it up and carried it to a nearby grassy knoll, thinking it would have taken it the rest of the day across the hot, busy parking lot and set it on a nice clump of flowers. I walked back to my car where the book was still sitting squarely in the middle of the sidewalk and people were just walking around it, not really giving it much of a look... I shrugged my shoulders and went into the great coffee shop at my neighborhood Tattered Cover and had a great meeting. I kind of forgot the whole incident until I plugged my phone into my computer and the photos uploaded.







That very night as I came home in the twilight after a nice evening walk with Andy and Tootsie, right next to my front door was this dude. Apparently the Praying Mantis had spread the word and the other eager readers were trying to get a glimpse of my new book. At least someone had caught the reading bug!

THIS IS A READING BUG.

What are you reading?

THE BIG QUESTION!

I have heard the BIG question posed at EVERY writer's conference I have been to that included picture books.

I have been asked the BIG question numerous times by many aspiring authors and illustrators and never really had a good answer because it is subjective and depends on the editor in question.

I have however answered it before after hearing an agent say, "It is much easier for an editor to dismiss the work if they like the illustration but not the story or vice-versa. It is just simply easier to reject it and move on to the other thousand submissions. Poor pity for the really awesome story that never gets a chance because the illustration just isn't up to snuff..." I even heard an editor say, "How does one accept you and reject your spouse or best friend? Just easier not to hassle with it. There are too many people competing for the same prize. Sometimes it is much easier to find what should be rejected than what I am going to spend the next two years trying to sell."

Okay, that makes a lot of sense, "BUT MY PROJECT IS UNIQUE AND DIFFERENT! SURELY THIS DOESN'T APPLY TO ME?!"

Thursday night, the best answer in my estimation to the BIG question was given by an editor who really, really, really knows her stuff. After all, she is largely responsible for the other two guests joining a very enviable and elusive club of people: those who have won the coveted Newbury and Caldecott. Dinah Stevenson, VP and Publisher of Clarion Books, a division of Houghton Mifflin, was asked the BIG question after Linda Sue Parks and David Weisner gave excellent presentations about the process of taking their ideas through many drafts, false starts and successes to becoming very enjoyable, readable, interesting and exciting books (see Weisner's video below and get yourself a signed copy of his new book ART AND MAX at The Tattered Cover! It is an awesome book and will surely secure Weisner the fourth Caldecott, you heard it here first!)

SO, at the Tattered Cover near my home twenty three of us (three of us being Tattered Cover employees) sat listening to a Newbury winner, a three time, record setting Caldecott winner and Dinah Stevenson, editor for both of them. HOW FORTUNATE FOR THE FEW OF US WITHIN SPITTING DISTANCE TO GET TO ASK MORE THAN ONE QUESTION AND HAVE PERSONAL INTERACTION WITH THESE THREE GIANTS OF OUR WRITING COMMUNITY.

(Now, allow me a slight aside)
MY BIG QUESTION THAT NIGHT WAS; "My gosh, where is everyone?" I mean if an Oscar or Emmy winner was there FOR FREE to mingle with, the place would be packed and jammed tight. Here we were truly in the presence of a sort of genius in all three panel members and it was largely ignored? Well, as my mother used to say when I turned up my nose to something I now would give my eye teeth to have for dinner, "Oh well, good, there is just more for the rest of us!"

(Even though I was taking notes on my ipad during the night, I did not transcribe the specific conversation, therefore allow for the fact that what I say was said, just not exact. I am not in the business of putting words into other's mouths... wait, that is my business, but only in my fiction...)
When asked the inevitable BIG question, "Is it a good idea for an author to send his or her manuscript with illustrations?" Dinah, David and Linda Sue Parks glanced at each other with a look of knowing. Dinah said, "No! One of the biggest thrills I get as an editor is marrying my image of who would best represent the author on paper, and the discovery process is what I love. It is FUN to watch the process..." The persistent person with the question (with an obvious agenda, in that she probably already had her sister-in-law, colleague or someone else take a stab at illustration or had done it herself) asked again, "What if the author illustrates it?" Dinah said something like, "Well if one has the talent to do both, then of course, but if it isn't the author's illustration I DO NOT recommend sending it with illustration." with a shrug of her shoulder Dinah was ready to move on to the next question.

SO, WAIT, THE EDITOR CONSIDERS IT A LARGE PART OF HER JOB TO BRING NEW VISION TO THE WRITER'S WORDS AND THAT IS WHAT BRINGS HER FUN???? THEN WHY, OH WHY, WOULD I DREAM OF ROBBING HER OF HAVING FUN? AFTER ALL, FUN IS WHY I WRITE! AND FUN IS WHAT I INTEND FOR MY READERS TO READ. WHAT FUN IT IS GOING TO BE WHEN DINAH DISCOVERS THE PICTURE BOOK MANUSCRIPT I'M STUFFING IN AN ENVELOPE ON HER DESK SOON!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZuIsAIKiNgY

By the way, for those of you who are aspiring authors for children's picture books as well as chapter books, here is a nugget of GOLD for you. Dinah Stevenson answered another question posed and her answer brings hope. The question was, "Do you read unsolicited manuscripts?" Dinah said, "Clarion is one of the very few publishers who read EVERY manuscript sent in. Linda Sue Park was plucked from the slush pile!" Did I mention Linda Sue Park won the NEWBURY???? I am sending Dinah a manuscript on Monday...

What will you do next?

It's coming... If you have a reluctant reader, check this out!

WHAT?????

http://www.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/1889191205/ref=sr_1_3_olp?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1286396710&sr=1-3&condition=used

Every so often a guy just has to google himself. I was looking for some reviews to send to an agent I am corresponding with and came across this page on amazon.com

This book sells for $19 and though there are dangerously few of the first book in the series, who would expect to spend five times that? Sure, it is a limited printing and will someday be worth more because I plan to be really famous.

I mean, it is being reillustrated and will come out with a totally different look, so the original is harder and harder to find, but come on, the cheapest copy is $113????? The most expensive is $201.67???? AND they are all used.

You can still get it on my website for $19 plus $3 for shipping, but I am thinking of selling the last two cases I have on amazon for $99.99 each, what do you think?

Is there something I don't know? Did the author expire? Back to googling to see what is going on!

WHAT TO DO?

In the past month I have won four international lotteries in countries I have nothing to do with, HOW LUCKY AM I? I have been offered three jobs in Canada by Asian firms that need my "financial knowledge and ability to handle large sums of money (so strange because I needed a tutor in college to pass my finance and accounting classes being non math inclined) that can flow through my own bank account, in which I can keep, get this "90% of all collections, some amounting in the past year to over $1,000,100 million US", (interesting that it adds the extra $100????)

I have been offered the fortunes of several royal families in Uganda and Somalia as well as so many other fortunes that I have yet to collect on... too little time and SO much money, what should I do?

So, just when I was about to start responding to all of these wonderful opportunities I get this email: I'm writing this with tears in my eyes,my family and I came down here to London,England for a short vacation unfortunately we were mugged at the park of the hotel where we stayed,all cash,credit card and cell were stolen off us but luckily for us we still have our passports with us. We've been to the embassy and the Police here but they're not helping issues at all and our flight leaves in few hrs from now but we're having problem settling the hotel bills and the hotel manager won't let us leave until we settle the bills.. Patrice.

Since I am about to get so many fortunes, I feel obligated to send "Patrice" all of the money in my bank account. The problem is with my memory, I am having a hard time remembering how I know her? Anyone who reads this that knows Patrice and or me, please help me help Patrice. Though I did think it was a bit weird that she didn't even address it to me personally with the emergency state of it and she sent it to UNDISCLOSED RECIPIENTS, which makes me wonder why she doesn't use my normal email address, Oh Well, I am sure she needs my money more than me. HELP?

The Gabriel Book Of World Records is OUT TODAY!

Gabriel Peters and his friends set out to attain their positions in history between the pages of the coveted record book through many attempts at the absurd (The World’s Largest Spit Pool) to the simply unattainable (World’s Largest Frog Farm). Gabe and his friends are up to their usual mischief. Along with the attempts to get into the book, a whole bunch of other adventures are included; a new member to the Secret Brotherhood named T-Bone Garza, Glenn The Sea Monkey comics begin, the discovery of the neighborhood’s own “Cruella DeVille”, more Ghost Indian sightings, an Ultimate Dare-Off which places the boys overnight in a haunted schoolhouse, a newly formed Boy Scout Troup, fishing, camping and many, many other explorations which will assure that the ADVENTURES CONTINUE!

What could be more compelling, mysterious or interesting than the people and feats contained within The Guinness World Book of Records? The irresistible gawking, rubbernecking and wonder that comes from the athletic feats and other human endeavors are food for thought enough, then add records for spitting, burping, growing extra long, gross fingernails and the book becomes a page burner (when a book is so great it is described as a page turner, when read even faster it becomes a page burner).

A tribute to those who LIVE life to the MAX!

After posting the other day about my buddy in a wheelchair, a friend who saw my blog sent me this clip and informed me that wheelchair is one word, not two, who knew?

Please watch this, it is inspirational and the next time I feel like complaining about a sore muscle or something minimal, I will come back here and watch this video!

Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iI_N5T3pmxQ&feature=player_embedded

What did you do today to add some excitement to your life?

Last night... magic...

I did a talk for a group of kids, teachers and parents at a school I have visited numerous times not far from my house. It was a pleasant evening as I mingled in the library and then was eagerly greeted by a young girl who clutched her copy of Ol' Lady Grizelda, which I had signed for her five years ago, when she "was a little kid, in 3rd grade" and now she was in middle school and "still really liked the book". She insisted I update her copy with another note and signature and then informed me my signature had changed (aka, gotten sloppy) and said, "See you in another five years." after we talked about the fact that she wanted to be a teacher. I envisioned another five years which meant I could see her again when she was student teaching in a classroom. WOW, time does keep ticking... I imagined her copy of Ol' Lady Grizelda going from a bedroom bookshelf to a classroom bookshelf and smiled. Maybe I would work on my penmanship, so my third signing of it would show improvement?

Soon we gathered in the music room where I told some stories, primarily stories upon which my books are based. As I explained the GP series and where the ideas came from I talked about how my main character Gabriel Peters (GP) begins in book one, Go Ask Mom, with some "strikes" against him, mostly physical, which draws attention and wrath from some school bullies and as a result Gabe is bullied and must find some solutions.

As I told the story I became quite aware of a young man sitting in a wheel chair listening intently to me talking about physical "shortcomings" that were causing Gabe some problems and wondered what he was thinking. He was holding a copy of Go Ask Mom so I knew he was very aware of the conflict in the book. He nodded in recognition as I told stories about Gabe's narcoleptic cat, his mean big brother who Gabe chased out of their shared bedroom one night with nothing more than a lot of imagination and a good, scary story and other adventures.

At the end of my talk it was question time and then it was time to go back to the library, to the book fair, to sign some books. My friend on wheels chimed in as did his mother, but more one on one as the others filed out to go back to the library. He, a really good-natured boy and a social ease recounted parts of the book he really liked. Mom and son both told me how reading Go Ask Mom together had brought them a lot of good times, where mom could recount her neighborhood adventures and how similar they were to Gabe's. My young friend told me how he had used the idea Gabe used to do something different to catch a bully of guard, using his words "like Gabe" to baffle. He simply said "sparkly wheels", because his wheelchair has a cool lighting gizmo, kind of like those tricked out cars that light the undercarriage at night and the bully didn't know how to react. He continued to just say that simple phrase whenever the bully would approach and it seemed to properly keep him off guard because soon it appeared as thought he bully wanted to befriend instead of be mean.

Later in the library, as they had me sign a copy of the sequel, The World According to Gabe, mom told me more stories about how they had connected to Gabe and she thanked me numerous times for writing the book. It seemed at that moment as if the reason for writing that book had been to help a young man in a wheelchair learn how to make the world work a little better and I felt a sense of pride nothing else could have brought. When my young friend wheeled up eagerly holding several toys (does every kid in the world think the book fair is a toy fair?) he was delighted to see mom had already had me sign the second book for him.

As he clutched the book close, he wheeled away, but over his shoulder he said, "I can't wait to see what happens next." I thought he was going to burst when I told him The Gabriel Book of World Records was coming out next week. I imagined mom and son cracking open his new prize at bedtime in just an hour or so and the "new" adventures of Gabe once again filling his bedroom.

As I drove home in the dark, with probably the last of summer evening warmth flowing over me, I was filled with a sense that I was really doing what I was put here to do: Writing stories, telling stories, living stories.

You never know when something you share with the rest of the world is going to make a difference. So, what story do you have that could be shared that would change someone in a small or big way?

Dear Alyssa,

http://alyssacares.org/alyssas-story.htm

Many of my pursuits and daily interactions are guided by the wisdom from parents who desire the very best for their children. Specifically my mother taught me on many occasions to "go out there and be a plus and never a minus'. It is very simple math. If you think about every "transaction" with another human as adding rather than subtracting it is really simple to know what to do. Never being good in math, I have always understood being a plus and try to be in my life and in my books.

I always want to add the love of reading, LAUGHTER, family bonding, interesting stories, a slightly different view to make one ponder and so many other things to my writing and publishing. I never want to subtract from a person's love of reading. That is why having learned about Alyssa, I have found a kindred spirit in her because of her zeal for the written word and STORY!

There are times when you meet people and you feel you were "meant to". I recently met Alyssa's father and spent time talking to him about his daughter, his cause, his heart. My heart hurt for this kind and spirited man as he told me of his loss. My heart zoomed when I realized what he and his family are doing to give the world a big plus thanks to Alyssa's passion. Many times it is easy to retreat, to withdraw and to anguish rather than to channel passion and love into something that is healing and helpful and a big PLUS for the rest of the world when someone feels the depth of sorrow this family has. I feel compelled to add to what they are doing!

So, I am asking anyone who reads this blog to consider what Alyssa's family and friends are trying to accomplish in this world, one book at a time, one story at a time, one school at a time, one child at a time. Literacy is one of the greatest keys to a future of hope. YOU can make a difference in the world you live in.

This is the FIRST time I have used my blog to promote a "cause" in three years. This one is just that important!

Essentially what the Alyssa Cares Foundation does is provide books to children who otherwise don't own them. Books free of charge as well as a heart warming message and passion for Alyssa's love of reading.

As an author, I am impressed and humbled by their efforts.
As a father, I am heartbroken and want to find a way to increase this lovely girl's legacy.
As a human being, I am interested in giving children, who for whatever circumstances they have no control over, a hand, a heart, a book, and a belief that their story matters.

Please spend some time on the website and join me in promoting literacy through this lovely organization! YOU can certainly be a PLUS here!

http://alyssacares.org/alyssas-story.htm